Recently I re-opened a book that has been sitting on my bookshelf for many years. We all have those kinds of books, ones we intend to read cover to cover, absorbing every detail, letting it transform our lives, yet somehow we never get past the second chapter. Yeah, one of those books... Well, I was feeling like I needed some transformation. So I slid the book from its dusty shelf and opened to the first page where I found this familiar quote:
I first read, studied and analyzed this quote while preparing my senior thesis in my final year of college. The subject of the thesis was on the music that Aaron Copeland composed for two choreographers – Martha Graham and Agnes de Mille. At that point in my life I had an extreme passion for music and dance, one that motivated every action I took and Martha Graham was my creative idol (she still is). In looking back now almost 15 years later, I wonder what happened to that passion. I still appreciate all forms of visual and performing arts yet somehow I lost sight of how I participate in them. My need to provide a comfortable lifestyle for myself has dominated my daily living to the point where I now feel creatively aged, dried up and empty. I secretly told myself that being an artist was just a hobby for me with which to pass the time between my childhood and the day I joined the real world as an adult. Inside I always hoped that my talents were genuine yet I allowed the critical self-talk to take over and talk me out of ever pursuing my artistic dreams. I’ve spent many years wondering what could have been. Living with the constant dissatisfaction of my daily routine, I’ve become numb. I deeply miss the creative passion I once felt, the moments of inspiration, the feelings of accomplishment. It was with this heavy heart that I re-read this quote and I felt… hope. The words popped off the page at me! I felt an instant realization that no matter what I might think I’ve “lost” there is no denying that the power of my unique expression must prevail. No matter the illusion of how much time has passed, it truly is my business to remain open and aware. I am taking the action, here and now, to do everything I can to keep that life force unblocked and the channel open. My creativity may look different now yet its inevitable expression still holds the same motivation, passion and accomplishment of my college days. It is with this same enthusiastic energy that I share what I have learned. I do not claim to be an expert nor will I ever think that I have all the answers. I know that I am learning still, ever evolving and changing. I just want to help others do the same within their own unique journeys…
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